Our house on post was a two bedroom duplex with a good sized garage and a pretty big yard. Behind our yard was nothing but trees, exactly what this country-raised girl needed. We were one the edge of the 'back 40' where the Army did all their training and field exercises.

We moved in at the beginning of September and by the middle of the same month, my husband was deployed for 12 months to Iraq. It was hard to be in a brand new place by myself. I am good at imagining the worst so I thought of those trees and how nobody would see if someone snuck in my back door. I left a light on in the house so that if someone was there I would see their shadow under my door.

It was scary and hard. It took a lot of prayer, but I got through it. Our house made a lot of sounds and it sounded like someone was moving around in the bathroom at night when nobody was. Even other people would make comments about how many noises our little house made. But I got used to it and settled in and felt safe and comfortable.

Then came spring.

One evening I left my room and went across the hall to check on my daughter. On the way back I almost tripped over a huge spider standing right next to my door. Right next to where I had just stepped when walking through the doorway. This spider was big enough it would have taken up my entire palm if I could hold a spider that size without having a heart attack.

I had no bug spray or any other kind of chemicals to kill it with and it was big enough I didn't think I could go at it with only a flyswatter. I wondered how crazy I would look if I knocked on a neighbors door to ask if her husband could come kill my spider. Too crazy, I decided, so I called my brother. He would kill it for me if he could, I knew, only he was 7 hours away in my hometown.

I knew I needed someone to know that I was getting ready to undertake something dangerous in case I didn't make it. They could send someone for my daughter.

While I had him on the phone, I got the biggest, heaviest shoe I could find to go kill the spider. I snuck up on it in the hallway and lunged. At the last second the thing dodged my weapon and into the bathroom. It got between the door and the frame where I couldn't get to it with such a big shoe. I tried and tried but it would only lunge at me between my own strikes. Finally, it took off into my bedroom and hid under a blanket of Lillian's that was on the floor.

I beat that blanket for a full minute. Then, my brother said the words that still make me shiver. "You are going to have to look." I picked up the blanket to check that the spider was indeed dead and *sigh* it was.

After that my mom thought she would have fun with it and told me it was probably a baby spider and now the mama would be coming after me. haha, mom!

I never did see another one so big, but I did see a LOT of them after that day. If they were small enough, I would just drop a heavy shoe on them. If they were bigger, I learned to spray them and just wait until they were dead to sweep them up. If I squished them, they would splat all over the floor (eww!) and make a bigger mess to clean up.

I got handled it, but I never could get used to moving something and finding a spider under it. It would make me jump and squirm every time.

Eventually, my husband came home and became the spider killer. He was amazed at my cool, collected attitude toward the spiders, but inside I still had the shivers.

8 Things Meme

I saw this meme at Beck's and since she didn't tag anybody, I am going to pick it up. Here we go!

Eight Things I'm Looking Forward To:
1. My husbands parents are coming this weekend to stay. It will be the first time they have stayed with us so we are looking forward to the extra time with them.
2. My 10 year high school reunion this summer. Should be fun. Hope it's fun...
3. I might get to go to the library alone this evening. Alone, but with a friend.
4. Summer!
5. Chris coming home and listening to Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince before bedtime.
6. Watching Lie to Me while I fold laundry
7. Going on a weekend getaway in a few weeks. The kids first trip to an amusement park.
8. Working on some knitting

Eight Things I did Yesterday:
1. Slept too late
2. Got to church a bit late
3. Taught 7 3 year olds in Sunday School
4. Worked in the nursery during the afternoon service
5. Ate leftovers for lunch
6. Took a nap
7. Had our last AWANA night before our award ceremony
8. Cooked bacon and eggs for dinner at 8 PM

Eight Things I Wish I Could Do:
1. Eat whatever I wanted and not gain weight
2. Sew- it is my next project. I have already picked out the machine I want.
3. Make time speed up or slow down at will.
4. Trade brains with someone for awhile.
5. Afford a full time house keeper
6. Do a better job staying in touch with people
7. Always know the right thing to say
8. Think of another goal...

Eight Show I Watch:
1. Lie To Me
2. The Office
3. Psych
4. Burn Notice
5. Monk
6. Myth Busters
7. Phineas and Ferb
8. Good Eats

I am tagging you. There, now go do it!

When we are in the car or on walks, Lillian likes to imagine about her future. She has a whole house planned out with several swimming pools and maids that will take you to Chuck*E*Cheese anytime you want to go.

She wants to wonder who she will marry and what she will do. She has decided to be a princess mermaid. Then a teacher and right now she wants to be a singer. No matter what she says she wants to be, she says "but I will me a mom, too. Because I want kids." We have talked about getting married before you can have kids and that you can do whatever you want to do and have kids too, if you want.

The other day she said something about having kids and it occurred to me that maybe she wouldn't have kids for some reason. Maybe she will decide not to or maybe she will not get married for some reason. Maybe her and/or her husband will not be able to.

I told her that not everyone has kids when they grow up. She said "What!? They get to choose?" I told her yes, people get to choose. Then she said, "Oh, I thought Jesus got to choose."

Advice Needed

Last weekend our neighbors moved and had a yard sale. They had an Easy Bake oven for sale. I told Lillian what it was and if she wanted it she could go ask about it. They said she could have it for a dollar and I said IN FRONT OF THE MOM that Lillian had to buy it out of her tooth fairy money. So she got it and brought it home and when I looked at it, it was only the oven itself.

So here is where I need the advice. Should I look for the other pieces and buy them for her or buy her a new one or just let her learn a lesson? I should add that this is the very first time Lillian has bought anything with her own money.

Right now I stuck the oven in the garage and she seems to have forgotten about it all together. I told her that she needed to still be a little older to play with it by herself and it didn't have all the pieces yet so we couldn't use it anyway.

What do you think?

So, I was on this diet. But then I had a package of unwrapped kisses in the cupboard. Did you know that you can buy them already unwrapped? Or, I guess they just don't wrap them in the first place.

Anyway, while I was cleaning the kitchen I had them out on the counter and was popping one in my mouth whenever the kids weren't looking because I am nurturing that way. Then, I put Isaac (who is 2) down for his nap and sent Lillian (who is 5) upstairs to clean her room while I shut myself in my room looking at knitting patterns.

Eventually, Isaac woke up and as I was walking through the kitchen I thought I would grab a piece of chocolate for him but the bag was gone. I looked in the cabinet thinking I had stashed it safely away but it wasn't there. So I asked Lillian where she put my chocolate and she said she flushed it down the toilet. I laughed and said very funny but she said "No really, I did." Then she took me upstairs and showed me. She said she ate a few and then dumped the rest down the toilet and flushed them. I just couldn't stop laughing long enough to be mad at her. I still haven't figured out her reasoning but I am pretty sure it was not with my best interests at heart.

Also, if your 2 year old puts bean and bacon soup in his hair but you just lay him down for his nap anyway, when he wakes up it will look like a stylist for a hip magazine has styled his hair.

My crazy computer finally died. May it rest in pieces. My husband bought me a snazzy new one so I am finally back.

Just to recap the rest of my diet/detox, I ended up going for 10 days. The last few days I only drank 1 glass of juice the entire day. I just wasn't hungry. Eventually, though, I just couldn't take it any more. I had to chew something. It started to get to me, so I ended it.

I feel like 10 days was an accomplishment that I can be proud of. I fell short of my goal by 4 days but for my first time at this, I am proud of myself. I am already planning on doing another one soon.

I ended up loosing 12 pounds. I have gained back 4 since I started eating again, which is what I expected to happen. Once you eat solid food again, you will naturally gain back 3-5 pounds.

The biggest change that I have noticed is that I get full so fast! I will sit down with the amount of food I am used to eating and I can't finish it. I think the cause of this is first, my stomach is smaller than before. That sounds weird, but when we are used to stuffing our selves (not that I did that. *ahem*) our stomach gets larger and it takes more food to feel full. So my stomach went back to the size it should be, or at least closer to it.

The second thing is, I have learned to read my body better. I know when I am full and can stop eating and when I just want something. Also, when I want something, it is probably water that I am wanting.

I just want to leave you with this recipe. I have eaten this for lunch this week and I look forward to it every day. It is so good you will feel like you are eating something naughty when it is SUPER good for you.

Veggie Wrap

spread:
1/2 block cream cheese (this is enough for several wraps)
Tb sun dried tomato pesto

mix together and spread over tortilla or flat bread

mix:
1 shredded carrot
1/4 shredded and peeled cucumber
shredded Monterrey jack cheese
diced tomato

put a generous amount on tortilla. Add a large handful of fresh spinach leaves and roll.

You can do this wrap SO many different ways. It is the spread that makes it. I also added some bean sprouts. You could add some turkey or even grilled chicken. Trust me- make this today!

Day 6

Today is day 6 of my detox diet. I have lost a total of 9 pounds so far. I am feeling great and have tons of energy. Exactly like everything has said. I am not hungry, but am always SO thirsty.

I have always been a very low energy person. Lately, probably at partly because of my weight gain, I have been even more sluggish. Anything that I did would wear me out. So today I had enough energy to do everything I wanted to do with out being worn out and needing a nap. For me, that is a big thing. I am loving how I am feeling now.

I thought I would answer a few questions. Becky from Frumpmama wanted to know if I am following a specific book. I'm not. My biggest resource has been http://www.juicefasting.org/. They do have a down loadable book that you can follow. I also just google juice recipes and find some good ideas. I also linked to a great article at cbn.com about fasting.

Phoebe from Cents to Get Debt Free (who is my friend from high school! Hi Phoebz!) wanted to know if I tried a green smoothie. I can't have a smoothie. Even though it does sound good. Spinach with mango blended in a blender. Even though it is a blended smoothie, it is still solid food. I can only have liquid from the vegetables or I will continue to be hungry. There is some pulp that comes out of the juicer. Most of that I let rise to the top and spoon off. I did get some spinach and am deciding what to do with it. I don't really know if I can juice it.

My sister wanted to know if I have had any "poo issues." Thanks, sis. You always keep it real. I have had the issues you would expect to have after eating only raw vegetable and fruit juice for almost a week.

Another thing I wanted to add was that I feel like my taste buds are changing. Before I needed sweet or salty or garlicky food to enjoy it. Today for dinner I drank the juice from a tomato, half a green pepper, a carrot and 2 apples. It was so good! Not something I would have enjoyed a week ago.

Also, I have never been able to drink a lot of water. I was always making sugar-free flavored waters but lately have been feeling bad about all the artificial flavoring and sugar that I was drinking and even giving to the kids. So the amount of water that I crave every day has been great. Water is my favorite thing right now.

The hardest part so far has been cooking for my family and not taking a bite to taste the seasonings. Okay, and not taking just a bite of cheese tonight. I have been making really yummy dinners and sitting down with my glass of juice and watching my husband and kids eat. That is not easy, but not hard any more.

So, thanks for all your support and kind words. It has really helped to raise me up.

Day 4

Let me just say that I hope today was the worst day and that it is over now. I feel like I have been only complaining these last few days and I need to get away from that.

I have had one weird reaction, though, that I wanted to talk about. My mouth has been burning and I think I figured out why. Sometimes when I juice a lemon I just put the entire lemon in the juicer. I think all the zest from the lemon was burning. So, lesson learned- the little extra flavor is not worth the pain.

So, enough of that and on to my good news. I was down three pounds today. And, I am enjoying an herbal tea with honey tonight to wind down with. I also want to report a success today. I was offered a piece of chocolate- it was even dark chocolate. I turned it down.

Anyway, not a lot to report today. I feel like this post is too boring to even publish, but here we go! I am hoping to have only good things to report for tomorrow.

Day 3

No weight loss to report for this morning. I was thinking of weighing myself again before bed but I want to stick with my rule of weighing in the morning. I do have some good news, a pair of pants that I couldn't button a few weeks ago fit nicely today. Well, still a little snug but I could wear them. These are pants that fit great last summer and a few weeks ago had a big way to go to fitting. I am looking forward to trying a few other things on.

There is a great article today at cbn.com about juice fasting. There are a few recipes as well. That was encouraging to read right now. I am hungry right now. Probably the most that I have been so far. It isn't anything that I can't handle. It is so different than how I usually feel when I am hungry. If I didn't eat for a while I would get very shaky and VERY grouchy. Right now, though, in spite of a few tummy rumblings I feel pretty great.

My arms and legs felt sore today and still felt weak. I had a nice nap this afternoon while the kids were in their rooms and it helped a lot. I have been reading that the 3rd or 4th day is the worst. So either today was it and I am past it or tomorrow will be. Either way I can tell things are going to be fine. I did not have much trouble today with the temptation of food at all.

And I know now what a temptation it was. There was an obedience problem that is coming to light. I have been given stewardship over this body, this house, and this family. I have not been properly taking care of any of that. I need to take care of my body and not indulge in whatever craving I have at the moment. That is not God's plan for me or my body. This body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and I need to treat it like it is.

So, I am going to keep going with this. I am actually enjoying the process. I am enjoying learning so much about myself, even in these few short days. I can't believe how much I thought about food. I can't wait to see what else is in store!

Breakfast:
1 mango (minus a few pieces for the kids)
enough pineapple to fill up the glass

Dinner:
2 carrots
1/4 cucumber
1 lemon

Day 2

Today was not so bad. I was really prepared for the worst. I did not wake up hungry and I haven't had any terrible hunger pains all day. I was a bit hungry tonight after dinner, but it was not too bad. Nothing a glass of water didn't fix.

I have had a few weird things today. I don't know if it is really related to the detox or not, but I will report them anyway. I have had a sort of coating on the roof of my mouth that will not go away. Even right after brushing it still feels yucky.

I had a small headache all afternoon. Nothing that I would normally take Tylenol for but it was there.

I have felt sluggish today. Like my arms and especially my legs just didn't have any energy. Climbing the stairs felt like a major accomplishment today. I didn't feel tired today, just like I did something strenuous.

For breakfast I had the BEST drink. It was 2 pears (2 was too many- next time I will use 1 1/2) a lemon and a small piece of ginger root. It could also be made with apple in place of the pear. This was so good! I will be making this even when I am not on a diet/detox!

For dinner I had 1/2 carton of cherry tomatoes- all I could find that were ripe, a few handfuls of grapes for sweetness and 1/2 green pepper. It was not bad, but very thick. The green pepper seemed to stay at the top even after I stirred it. The grape juice sank to the bottom, so the last half was much better than the first. Sort of like dinner and dessert all in one glass.

The hardest thing today was making dinner. (Oh, my husband quit. Did I say that already? He lasted about 12 hours.) I made home made spaghetti sauce. It was hard to make without tasting it. It would not have been a big deal, but I knew it would make me hungry. Also, when I was helping Isaac (who is 2 now) with his food it was very hard not to lick my fingers. Also, the cookies were teasing me today. "Just one butterscotch chip!" they kept calling from the counter.

I have to say, I have been impressed with my willpower so far! Tomorrow, though, is Mops. We are having a spring swap so it won't be a regular meeting with a ton of food, but I know there will still be something good. If I can get through tomorrow morning, I will be set. This is going to take a lot of prayer.

So, um, I lost 4 pounds? I know it is just water weight at this point, but I like that number on the scale. Also, I was expecting to be SO hungry when I woke up this morning, but I'm not! I feel pretty good. Normally when I wake up in the morning I could eat my own arm I am so hungry so this is a pleasant surprise! I will report more later!

Day 1

Today was the first day of my juice diet. My cleanse.

For breakfast I had a grapefruit, an orange and 2 small apples. Not bad! Sweet and filling enough. I was hungry by dinner time but not intolerably. Then at dinner I had 4 carrots, 1/4 cucumber, 1 stalk of celery, 1 and 1/2 apple and 1/2 lemon. All I can say is yuck! It was just too thick. I ended up leaving some in the glass. Next time I think I will only use 2 or 3 carrots and a whole lemon. The cucumber gave it a nice flavor, it was just the thickness of the juice that I didn't like. Oh, and a few glasses of water.

The day went fine. I was pretty tired around 2:00, but I don't know if that is really anything different. I kept busy to keep my mind off wanting to eat. That was the biggest struggle today. I had to remember not to just pop something into my mouth as I went about my day. Just a bite of a cookie or just one slice of cheese. I never realized how much I would eat during the day. This has really made me notice how bad my eating habits are.

The biggest question, I think, would be how bad is the hunger. Right now I am hungry but I really feel that it is more of wanting food than needing it. My stomach isn't growling or hurting, but at night when the kids are in bed is my time to sit on the couch and veg. Eat whatever I want and not have to share it with them.

One thing I have been surprised to notice is how thirsty I have been. I have really noticed that a lot more than feeling hungry. My body is in a constant state of dehydration and I really want to change my habits in this area. I need a LOT more water on a daily basis and I hope to start some good habits. I did stay away from coffee today. I am not a person that can not live without it so I might as well do this right.

I think tomorrow is going to be worse than today, but once I am over that it will all get better. I have decided to weigh myself daily first thing in the morning. I am not going to post my weight, but I am going to post my weight loss. I will most likely post once in the morning to report any weight loss. The isn't a great chance of having any to report so early, but I am sure I will be loosing plenty of water weight in these first few days.

Now I am going to sleep (after I fold a few loads of laundry and watch Lie to me) and forget about food for a while.

Today begins a new season in my life. A new first. My first diet. In the past I have tried to watch what I eat to loose weight and tried to exercise. I had different results each time. The easiest way for me to loose a lot of weight in a small amount of time is to have a nursing baby. Then, the weight just melts off but after that it starts to creep back on and before I know it I have 15 pounds or more to loose, none of my pants fit and I feel lousy.

Today I am starting day 1 of my juice fasting diet. I am excited to see what happens. This is a total detox diet and who knows the amount of junk I am carrying around. I decided to chronicle my experience here. So, after a long absence from blog-land, I am going in a slightly different direction. I am sure I will still pop on and make a comment about my kids or my knitting.

My husband is also trying this with me. Hopefully he will be a built in support system. I also have a friend that is doing a variation of this diet. I decided on this particular diet first because I have witnessed the results and they were amazing. After doing my own research I found there are many health benefits to a fasting diet. I also am hoping to jump start my weight loss. My husband decided to try it just because I am doing it.

The plan is to try this for about 12-14 days. If we are feeling like we can take it, we may add another 5 to 7 days. The health benefits during this last week are the greatest. We will drink a glass of juice in place of every meal. No solids are allowed. Drink plenty of water in between. Coffee is allowed, but only black or with non-dairy creamer. Dairy and all proteins are off limits. Of course no sugar and absolutely no chemicals- nothing processed or enriched. Only fresh fruit and vegetable juices.

I am excited about this. There is of course a very spiritual aspect of fasting, even a juice fast. I am excited what the Lord will show me during this time.

There are so many areas of my life that I need to get into order and this is a good way to get that started. I am armed with my juicer, my Bible and a kitchen full of fruits and vegetables and I am ready to start my journey!